Hello Mama, and welcome! First, I get you’re busy, Mama. So let me tell you the top 3 reasons why you should spend 30 minutes of their precious time reading this episode:

⚡ Quick Recharge for Busy Mums: 

Spend just 30 minutes listening to this episode to discover practical ways to recharge your energy levels and improve your well-being amidst your busy schedule.

⚡ Combat Overwhelm and Burnout: 

Learn insights and techniques to overcome overwhelm and burnout, empowering you to manage stress and prioritise self-care effectively.

⚡ Treat Yourself to Mother's Day Relaxation: 

Celebrate Mother's Day by gifting yourself a dedicated 30-minute break for relaxation and rejuvenation through a guided meditation session. It's a simple yet powerful way to prioritise your own well-being and set a positive example for your family.

Ready to invest 30 minutes in yourself?

For those of you that want to listen - click below to play the podcast:

Otherwise, you can read this week’s show notes below:

Hello Mama! Welcome to this week’s episode of Mumstoppable! I’m so glad you’re here, ready and willing to spend the next 20-30 minutes with me, working on YOU. It’s so rare these days that we take time out to work on ourselves, and I’m so proud of you for making the decision to do just that.

So without further ado, let’s begin…

First up… I’ve finally moved house! YIPPEE! Which means no more echoey recordings, and no more being surrounded by boxes. However, I am now recording from a summer house, so if you can hear a bit of background noise like birds or traffic, then I apologise. I will get that sorted out as the weeks progress.

So, as I’ve said, I’ve moved house. BUT that meant last week was absolutely horrendous… we’re no strangers to moving house. We have moved 3 times in the last 4 years. And the time previous to this move, we up rooted the whole family and moved across the country from Hertfordshire to Gloucestershire. That meant massive changes including a new school for the kids (and 6 weeks of homeschooling our youngest, whilst juggling full-time jobs, as we appealed a decision by the local council not to give him a place at our closest school… don’t even get me started on that). 

However, this move was BY FAR the most overwhelming and stressful move of the lot. And I couldn’t tell you why… Admittedly we did have a van load of animals to move at one point, due to the various chickens, ducks, fish and cockatiels we had acquired over the last 2 years (to go along with the existing 2 cats and a dog). On top of that the move has been a long time coming… We’ve been lucky enough to finally be able to buy a house of our own, having rented for our whole adult lives, but that’s meant a lot of uncertainty - to the point we actually started packing the house up in November last year, only to have the completion date drag on to the end of Feb.

And the reason I’m telling you all this, Mama, is because this move has absolutely scrambled my brain. I feel like the fact we have boxes of stuff everywhere at the moment is very reflective of my brain, which also feels full to the brim of jumbled boxes of stuff. There is no other word for it than “OVERWHELM”. And this is a feeling that’s all too common amongst mothers, isn’t it? Because we’ve looked at this before, and actually the “invisibility of motherhood”, whereby we are often expected to self-sacrifice and have the weight of the invisible load on our shoulders, and our pre-baby identities get minimised, leads to an overwhelming amount of negative emotions and mental challenges.

Peanut App's The State of Invisibility report, a whopping 80% of UK mums reported feeling overwhelmed at some point. And on the back of that, 82% report experiencing burnout/exhaustion in motherhood.

We’ve spoken about overwhelm before, but let’s look at burnout now… burnout often comes from prolonged periods of stress (hello motherhood!) and can manifest as physical exhaustion, mental fatigue and a lack of motivation, to name just a few symptoms. And one common misconception is that a good night’s sleep should have us feeling right as rain in no time - and I cannot tell you how angry it used to make me feel hearing this advice when I had young kids, Mama. So if you’re sleep deprived, I see you and I am here for you and I’m not about to tell you to nap when the baby naps or to start a bedtime routine for yourself as that will cure all your exhaustion. Because, the truth is, it won't… Because although sleep is extremely restorative, according to Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith’s book “Sacred Rest”, it’s just one of MANY types of rest that we need in order to replenish our energy stores - particularly when we feel burnt out. And the good news is that by practising some of these different types of rest, we can avoid burnout, feel more energised and mentally focused… (Mumstoppable anyone?!)

Now one thing I want to mention before we visit #coachingcorner to find out about 5 types of rest you can start practising today to feel more energised, I want to address something. Because I know from talking to my clients and all my research and reading, that mum guilt is real when it comes to rest… So I want to tell you now that rest IS NOT SELFISH! It’s not a luxury. It’s a necessity for all of us to live healthy lives. So give yourself permission now to REST when you need it, Mama. Learn to look out for the signs that your mind and body need rest, and TAKE THE OPPORTUNITY TO REST, before burnout strikes!

Okay, Mama. Now as I have already said, according to Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, there are many types of rest but she focuses in on 7. But in #coachingcorner, we are going to focus on my FIVE favourite types of rest., which I feel are most relevant to mums. And the good news is that these are ALL things you can start doing today, Mama. So we’ll have you feeling rested and full of energy in no time.

So let’s dive in by looking at:

1. PHYSICAL REST

Now this is the most obvious one, and it includes the all important sleep we talked about earlier. But the good news is, you can get physical rest in other ways… So don’t worry if you are still in the phase of motherhood where you literally cannot get a good night’s sleep. Alternatives to quality sleep include just lying down, relaxing your muscles (for example in a bath) or even gentle forms of movement such as yoga or a leisurely walk. All of these types of physical rest have similar benefits which include helping your body recover, reducing muscle tension and boosting your energy levels when they are depleted.

2. EMOTIONAL REST

We’ve talked a lot about emotions over the last few weeks, so it felt important to add this one in. Emotional rest means allowing yourself the freedom to fully FEEL and EXPRESS your emotions (albeit in a healthy way). This is important because we often spend a lot of time trying to suppress, hide or mask our emotions in daily life. For example as mums we try not to get angry at our children. So emotional rest is about breaking FREE from that stress of holding emotions in. 

So how can we do that? Well first it’s about being completely honest with yourself about how you are feeling. And then allowing yourself to FEEL that way. We’ve talked about this before, but some ways to do this might be to watch a sad movie and allow yourself to cry. It might be to SCREAM loudly into a pillow. There are so many ways to allow yourself emotional rest. 

And the other important piece here is to be aware of feeling extreme emotions, and make sure you seek professional support if you need it. Whether that’s through therapy or counselling for example.

The benefits of getting proper emotional rest are that you can actually improve your level of emotional intelligence. But on top of that, you will likely have improved relationships AND a sense of inner peace too. And that will all go towards making you a better, more patient and emotionally intelligent Mama too!

3. SENSORY REST

This is a biggie for a lot of Mamas. Because even outside of motherhood, we live in a world FULL of stimulation… we have screens and technology everywhere. We are constantly looking at bright lights and being exposed to loud noises. And on top of that, as a Mum we often have kids clambering all over us, wanting to cuddle and hold us, and needing to be physically supported by us.

Sensory rest means giving yourself permission to have a break from all this… That might be as simple as a night off of screens. Or turning off your devices of an evening. Or it might be giving yourself permission to go lie in a dark room for an hour at the end of a particularly stimulating day. Whatever you decide to do to give yourself sensory rest, by doing so, you’ll be reducing the constant strain we put on our senses which can lead to a calmer, more focused mind.

I’m going to let you into a secret now… and it’s something I don’t like to talk about because honestly it makes me feel like the worst mum in the world. But I think it’s important to let you know this, because in the rare instances I HAVE mentioned it to people, they’ve experienced the same thing. And in those moments I’ve known that I’m not alone. And that I’m not a bad mum. 

Now the big guilty secret is this… sometimes I feel completely “touched out”. And by that I mean, I’ll get towards the end of a particularly stressful day and my kids will inevitably want cuddles and lots of physical attention when they get home from school. But I just cannot bring myself to do it. I feel like my body has been SO overstimulated that I just cannot physically take another second of being touched. I crave a dark room where I can lie in peace and not be asked to “Mummy, watch!” or to have to listen to another story, or even for a hug. And when I do manage to get away from it all for 20 mins I come back restored and able to properly HUG my kids again - with real meaning and energy. Sensory rest makes me a better mum. 

4. SOCIAL REST

Okay we’re near the end now and this one is particularly important for any fellow introverts out there… Now as an introvert myself, although I am a very social person, I get very drained of energy when I have to have lots of social interactions throughout the day. Things like networking or parties, although I enjoy them, leave me feeling exhausted. If this feels like you, then take notice here… social rest is about either giving yourself permission to avoid social situations that you might feel draining, and surrounding yourself with people who support you and leave you feeling energised.

All of this leads to being able to build healthier, more fulfilling relationships, as well as making you more positive overall. How cool is that?!

5. MENTAL REST

Okay, I’ve saved this one for last for a reason, which I’ll divulge in the #coachingchallenge, but this one is fairly self explanatory. Throughout daily life, our brains are constantly processing information. We spend ALL day making decisions and solving problems - even  more so as mums of small kids, right? Because we’re constantly answering questions, helping them solve challenges and deciding what snacks to give them to keep them nourished… So is it any wonder that by the end of the day we find it absolutely exhausting to decide what’s for dinner? Or even what move to watch once they’re in bed?! 

Mental rest is all about giving your mind a break from all the processing. And it can be as simple as meditation, or even doing activities that take your mind off things. Running can be GREAT for this, as can things like crafting (I do love a good crochet blanket project at Christmas, when my mental activity is in overdrive and I need some mental rest!). And all these sorts of activity can reduce stress, improve your focus and boost your creativity!

So as a quick recap, my 5 favourite types of rest are:

1. PHYSICAL REST

2. EMOTIONAL REST

3. SENSORY REST

4. SOCIAL REST

5. MENTAL REST

Did any of these surprise you? Can you see where some of your overwhelm might be coming from some of these areas? And conversely can you see that there are different types of activity which promote rest in each of these areas, which could help you overcome the overwhelm, avoid burnout and leave you feel restored, replenished and ready to kick some butt?!

If the answer is no, you’re in the wrong place. Because any ONE of these types of rest can help you get one step closer to feeling Mumstoppable.

And that leads me beautifully into today’s #coachingchallenge! As I’ve said, this week is Mother’s Day and as such I have a lovely gift for you. But first I want to challenge you to ASK your partner and/or your kids for something this Mother’s Day. And that is to ask for AT LEAST 30 mins off from doing ANYTHING. 

Because your challenge this week is to REST. And more than that, I want you to commit to taking 30 minutes out this Sunday to go lie either in the bath or in your bedroom, ideally in the dark or with your eyes closed. And I want you to listen to the NEW Mumstopable podcast episode called “BONUS: Mother’s Day Meditation”:

And I want you to lie there and listen to it, completely uninterrupted. If you fall asleep along the way, that’s even better. But even if you don’t, by doing this you’ll be giving yourself all FIVE types of rest in one go! You’ll be resting your body, your brain, your senses and you’ll be getting social rest too. And you’ll even be getting emotional rest, as long as you let yourself really get into the meditation and feel ALL the feelings I talk you through.

The aim here is for you to feel replenished, re-focused and ready to tackle whatever life throws at you over the coming days! So give yourself permission to relax this coming week (as much as you can with kids who need you!).  You’ve got this!!

That brings us to the end of this week’s blog! Thank you once again for joining me, and well done for spending the last 30 mins doing something just for you! 

Enjoy working through this week’s coaching corner tips, and as always, I would LOVE to hear how you’re getting on with the coaching challenge, so please feel free to send me a quick email at [email protected] or find me on Instagram at @mumstoppable_ and send me a DM or leave a comment on one of my posts. 

You will also be able to find reminders of the coaching corner tips and details of the coaching challenge on Instagram towards the end of the week.

Over the coming weeks I’ll be talking to you about challenges facing mums ranging from feeling lost and like you don’t know who you are anymore, to surviving overwhelm as a mum, to motherhood and the strains that puts on your relationships, to the struggle of returning to work. Please also feel free to email me with any challenges you’re facing which you’d like me to cover off on upcoming sessions.

If you’ve liked what you’ve read today, please do sign up to my newsletter by clicking here. As a thank you for signing up, you can choose to receive my FREE “3 Steps to Mumstoppable Confidence” workbook. 

And more importantly, by signing up, you’re guaranteeing you’ll never miss a blog post (or Podcast episode!) as they will land directly in your inbox every Monday morning.

For now, though, have an awesome week, and remember:

I see you, Mama. 

You’ve got this. 

You are Mumstoppable!